Tuesday, August 26

Aliens isn't scary..yet!

I'm about a half hour into Aliens! So far, so good! I don't know what I was expecting, but it's definitely way better than most of the other awful sequels I've been watching lately (not that I'm surprised!).

So far we've only seen a little bit of an alien, but Ripley's nightmares make it clear that they are really gross when they pop out of people's chests. It looks like some colonists discovered the remains of the old alien ship (from movie 1) and are all either dead or infected. I think it's interesting that colonization strategy used here is also found in Firefly/Serenity. It seems that terraforming colonists get the short end of the stick in every movie and tv show. They get dumped on hostile planets and are practically abandoned to death and disease by the large corporations that fund their work. Sounds a lot like miners....hmm...

Anyway, it's now over an hour into the movie and I've now seen lots of dead people dripping in some kind of alien excretion (their words, not mine), a few aliens, and at least one person burned alive. I'm not sure how many Marines died in the last scene since there was a lot of blood and smoke, but the body count is pretty high. Bill Paxton is still alive, but he's kind of a dumb hick in this movie. He's also really whiny, and I think I wish he was being cocooned along with the other unfortunate Marines.

Some things I have learned:

1. Bill Paxton plays a super irritating Marine.

2. A small girl is able to survive in the air vents in the colony, but no one else is able to find a good hiding spot in the whole area.

3. Even if you have been encased in alien gook for 3+ weeks, you will still be alive and able to die horribly in front of the Marines. Who needs food or water when you're suspended mid-air anyway?

4. The aliens attack mostly at night..on a planet that is always dark. Hm. Doesn't that mean it's always night? Clearly the aliens know how to tell time.

Up Next: Aliens

James Cameron has a history of being pretty darn feminist. Not as awesome as Joss Whedon perhaps, but definitely all for women being powerful etc. I'm looking forward to Aliens, although apparently I'm watching the movies out of order. I didn't realize that Alien is the first, and Aliens (one measly letter different) is the second. Oh well!

Sunday, August 24

LP2 continues

Well, LP2 has taught us another valuable lesson. If you're a chauvinist pig, the crocodile will eat you. Just as you are demonstrating your boy scout rope-tying knowledge and impressing the little lady, you will die. First the crocodile will bite off your arm, and you will do a Wendy Adams (think the fight scene in Adams Family with the spurting blood), and then you will be dragged below the surface of the lake still screaming.

Also, the teenagers just broke the essential do not separate rule, and will most likely suffer the consequences. I'm pretty sure that the sheriff's son will make it out alive, and maybe even the blonde girl who looks like she's 18 going on 40. The hick beer guzzling guy is toast, as is the nude sunbathing girl. I think that blondie's irritating boyfriend (Thad) is also a goner, or maybe that's just wishful thinking on my part.

Ha, 46 minutes into the movie and the nude sunbather is dead, and the annoying boyfriend just delivered the worst one liner of the movie and was then eaten by the croc. I might have misjudged, and maybe beer guzzler is the dark horse survivor of the movie. Thanks to recently deceased Thad, we also know that the crocodile is reproducing, which means that it's more than likely that the one Amad just killed has a much larger and angrier partner hiding in the lake. Silly Sheriff and company forgot the large animals are just like serial killers rule....


Should have gone with my gut feeling. Stupid hick guy just got eaten, and tada.. there are actually 3 crocodiles. 1 dead, 2 still alive and terrorizing the teenagers.

Body count stands at 11 (including the guy who broke his neck while running in sheer terror). I'm betting that the final count will reach 13 and then the survivors will happily pair off.

Lake Placid 2

I saw the cover for Lake Placid 2 a few weeks ago in Blockbuster and have just not had enough time lately to sit down and watch/blog. With moving, going on the cruise (!) and going up to New York the blogging has fallen by the wayside. Anyway, I have a free afternoon and am looking forward to what promises to be a really awful movie.

In the first movie Betty White (of golden girls fame) was the crazy old lady, and Lake Placid 2 has gone a step further with Cloris Leachman!

At 15 minutes into the movie, the body count is already at 4 which is a good sign. One super stupid EPA guy, 2 naked girls, and 1 naked guy have all been eaten. I appreciate that LP2 is following the rules (sex=death etc) and am excited that the sheriff's son and his new friends are about to go on a camping trip to a remote part of the lake. I'm thus far mildly impressed by the croc graphics, mainly because they've been smart enough to only show it in snippets and it just ate a boat and didn't look totally fake or stupid.

Monday, August 18

I've been a bad blogger!

In the last few weeks I've moved half-way across the country, taken a vacation (my first cruise) and driven back and forth to my home town at least twice for family stuff. I didn't have internet during the moving or vacation parts of August, but I am going to start writing again this week. Just as soon as I figure out where I put my blockbuster movies...